Cos I have Him next to me

I'm longing those times

craving for those 'should's and 'shouldn't's

wanting those ex-unwanted lists

getting away from the approaching so-called 'trends'

Keeping the word 'understand' closer

Alas,

deep there,

I know I was right

Cos you lost what I won.

Doubtless.

"Time will heal, honey"

Insya Allah

[picture:an accessory]

Returning to Him

To God we belong, to Him we return. Al fatihah for Allayarham bro Dr. Mas Afzal Masarudin, a cancer fighter, a da'ie and a role model who passed away this early morning. The news was shocking. He was a full spirit, humble guy who did dakwah solely to seek Allah's blessings back in the UK when I first knew about his story. I happened to know him when he became one of FUiYO (Fun With ILuvIslam's Youth Oversea) 2009's speakers. Almost everyone was amazed with his spirits.

My father also wrote about him on Harakah newspaper months ago which you can read from here - http://www.facebook.com/note. He too was the 'Not the Primrose Path's blog owner http://masafzal.blogspot.com. A deep condolence from me and my family for his family. He was indeed a fighter, a strong one. May Allah lets him stand with those who stand for Allah.

One says "Good friends write song after you die. Better friends offer prayers on your death. Best friends pray for you until their death." Al-Fatihah.

My teacher had repeatedly said that the questions asked in the grave are already leaked but the truth is, not the mouth that'll answer (by memorising) but your deeds that you have collected during your lifetime will do it. We knew that, and yet, ignore it. There's always between wrong and right, bad deeds and good deeds, the Nar (Hell) and Jannah (Heaven).

You choose. I choose too.

p/s: I finished my mid term exam!!!

Kawan baik/BFF Maher zain

Verily, dua' is worship [At Tirmidhi]

Have you ever made a wish to God and it is fulfilled? It feels amazing, isn't it?

Having faith that your every dua' is heard and will be answered is a warm soothe to hearts. No matter its in time of despair or cheer, it always counts. Just like what Allah says in Al-Baqarah:186 "Call upon Me, I will answer you"...how beautiful is that? There is absolutely no hesitation. No doubt. No 'if'.

Patience in waiting is all what you need. Just have Iman in every Allah's word.

And if your dua' is not answered in the world, Rasulullah said, the reward of the dua' will be moved forward - to The Day of Judgement. Never once your dua' is a waste unless you say "Allah didn't answer my prayer". God loves those who make dua' everyday. Even saying "Assalamualaikum wbt" to someone is a call to HIM!

I did a post regarding Maher zain's performance at Newport, Wales just before Ramadan click. At the end of it, I wished he'll come again to the UK and come to Malaysia too. Then, just a few days before first Syawwal, below meeting happened where I was told about MZ's plan to come to Malaysia. About two weeks after that, MZ's Malaysia tour was everywhere on facebook. And currently he's having a tour in Malaysia which means my wish was fulfilled! subhanallah subhanallah ^___^

Well...I'm only a fan of his songs not a die-hard-fan, so it wasn't heartbreaking not seeing his performance there. hehe =)

Here is a little story attached...

Once upon a time at an Europcar counter in a western country, Sweden. Late Ramadhan 1431.

Daddy: Hello
Mm: Assalamualaikum
Daddy: oh..waalaikumussalam
Mm: Are you all from Malaysia?
Daddy: Yes..yes
Mm: Ooh. My friend is going to go to Malaysia soon. He's a singer...
Daddy: Maher Zain? (higher tone)
Mm: Yeahh, yeah! (excited)
Daddy: He's your friend???
Mm: He is actually my best best best friend! You guys've just missed him, he was at my house two days ago and we had an iftar together. He lives near by this place but he's in egypt now.

I remember Mm said "Maher zain was under the same company as Lady Gaga in the US but Subhanallah he left it. He wants to sing for the sake of Allah." That was a kick. There are certainly more people who can be like 'MZs'. Those who go back to the fitrah (nature), those who go back to The One, Allah.

Do you know 'For The Rest of My Life' song? Maher zain performed that song on Mm's wedding day as he's his BFF! (Wahhh~~~) FYI, MZ is married. Hmm...its like a story time listening to his stories about MZ's family, Islam in Sweden, Europe and Swedish culture. There's quite a big difference between the widespread of Islam and its practice level in Sweden compared to the UK. Its really much more advanced in the UK. Feeling glad to be here..

...........The conversation went on on and on............ And we forgot that we were there to get the car key not to hold an interview! xD

Then I asked,

Nur: Does Maher zain know that he's got a lot of Malaysia fan?
Mm: Yeah..he knows that. He said, "Brother, if I go to Malaysia, I have to walk like this" (while pulling his collar up and hide his face behind it). LOL!!!

A sister used to say "The beautiful thing one can make for someone is dua''.

I'm kind of girl who has always believed in miracles and currently am doing a countdown, wishing and hoping for the best. Truly need your prayers :)

Merci beaucoup. Jazakallah.

Nur
7 Zulkaedah 1431
Swansea, Wales.

SPM =D

Dear Comrades,
Selamat Bermujahadah. Bittaufiq wannajah!

from Swansea with love,
Byla

Seminggu Ramadhan

Ya Allah, kau telah sampaikan kami di awal Ramadhan, sampaikanlah juga kami di akhir Ramadhan...Amin~

A year already; Al Fatihah..

Someone had told me that if you are deeply missing someone who is no longer alive, generously recite Al Fatihah for that person.

Which I did.

Today's date shows that it's been a year my embah (grandpa) left me, left us. How time flies when you still hesitate to move on with life. Still, his easygoing smile and endless advices are alive in my memory as fresh as a morning daisy.

A few weeks before he was gone, he loved to hear his grandchildren sing Seroja song and he would cry afterwards. Simply because the song reminded him of his beloved grandchildren. There was one time where we made up a lyric cos we thought he was mad at us (and it turned out he didn't). It goes "Maafkan kami x4, Wahailah embah, janganlah marah, kami rela haii kena ketuk. Wahailah embah, janganlah merajuk, we are so sorry, we love you so much~"

He always adviced his children and grandchildren that;

1. Don't miss the prayers
2. Recite Al-quran frequently
3. Respect parents and teachers
4. Be friends with well mannered people
5. Always practice good manners

I remember your eyes teared up as a sign missing me,
And now my eyes tear up as a sign of how greatly I miss you.

12 August 09.

Luckily, I have Allah..

What are you supposed to do when you are told a news which is completely ridiculous?

I remember part of a text from a close friend of mine: 'If you have a big problem, tell it - My God is bigger than my big problem!' And as a human being, I couldn't resist to feel my heart as if it were sinks in a very deep ocean. I then realized Allah knows better what He had done and there is always something beyond of human knowledge behind it.

I hardly cry whilst reading Qur'an. In fact, I can just count it with fingers on my hands. I wasn't in that situation since a few weeks after my grandpa passed away back in August. I barely stand for this thingy. A good thing to do is - bursting out the problems to a loved one because He always there when others refuse to. You dont have to ask Him for that.

Like what I convinced myself of-
'Allah chose you to face this big test. You know why? Truthfully, because He loves you. The bigger the test is, the harder it is, the more good deeds you collect.'

"Do men think that they will be left alone on saying, "We believe", and that they will not be tested?" (Al-Ankaboot:2)

Somehow, those intense feelings will gradually eased, leaving the heart. Sometime. Don't forget people who are being tested more than us, our Muslim brothers & sisters in Palestine, Afghanistan, Iraq, Iran, Malaysia, Britain and over the world - pray for them.

Istiqamahkan Iman Islam Kami, ya Allah.

Allahuakbar.
Allah is great.
Allah Maha Besar.

Aku hambamu.

::Nur Nabilah Muhaimin
::.Night before Xmas

Perlukah dipertikaikan?

Dah lebih seminggu EidulAdha disambut seluruh umat Islam. Satu post pun saya tak buat tentangnya. Beraya pun agak kelam kabut dengan tarikh yang sama dengan Mock/Trial exam - dua paper plak tuwh. Jadi, cuti satu hari, postpone exams dan dapat tiga paper sekali untuk satu hari. ayoo..

Macam-macam gaya umat Islam di seluruh dunia menyambutnya, bagi memperingati kesanggupan Nabi Ibrahim a.s untuk mengorbankan anak lelakinya, Nabi Ismail a.s atas perintah Allah - kerna patuh dan cintanya pada Allah s.w.t. Saya amat pasti pembaca2 blog ini yang beragama Islam pasti tahu tentang cerita ini. Tapi, sanggupkah kita buat pengorbanan sebesar itu untuk Tuhan yang satu yang mencipta kita?

Kadang-kadang, pernah juga terlintas di fikiran "Kenapa Allah larang itu ini bla bla bla..?" Bukan jawapannya yang kita cari. Ya, saya tahu banyak kajian2 sains yang membuktikan keberkesanannya. Tapi jika tidak tahu, untuk argue samada betul atau tidak larangan itu tidak lah perlu. Contoh mudah seperti awat kena solat, tak bley minum arak dan kena pakai tudung.

Ayah saya selalu cakap tentang ini bila saya tanya. Satu sahaja yang perlu tahu - Allah itu Tuhan yang maha esa lagi bijaksana. Dia sudah menggariskan peraturan-peraturannya dan kita hambanya hanya perlu patuh padaNya dan ikut peraturan2 yang digariskan. Siapa kita hendak argue itu semua?

"Di antara manusia ada yang mengatakan: Kami beriman kepada Allah dan Hari kemudian, padahal mereka itu sesungguhnya bukan orang-orang yang beriman. (Al Baqarah 2:8)"

Tepuk dada, tanyalah diri.

Alhamdulillah, raya tahun ni best sangat walaupun tengah2 exam. Rasanya, lagi best dari Aidilfitri. Kami sefamili raya di Lampeter, town tempat Univ ayah study. Tazkirah oleh Dr Mawil yang berkaitan dengan Eidul Adha. Habis beraya kat rumah Uncle Zaidi & co dan Uncle Zaharuddin & co, balik rumah and faced the exams on the tomorrow's morning!

Apa-apa pun,
Tak kisahlah ke mana kita pergi
Apa yang kita pakai
Makanan apa yang disantap
Tetapi apa yang kita dapat darinya.

Hope you all had a fantastic aidiladha!

Still, the same thought at dissimilar site

Yeah, I've moved.

So, automatically this website is a new blog of Nur Nabilah Muhaimin. There is no change at all as the content is exactly the same. Why? Just that I find the name before was too long and this so-called honeydeww kept exclusive memory of mine. Owh ya, if you have already linked me or been a follower, I hope you dont mind changing to http://honeydeww.blogspot.com

Gracias I wish.

loads of wishes to be wished

8th November 2008

Lyric of song underneath;

Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday dear Mama
Happy birthday to you.

Its for last Sunday - 2nd November.
I wish late here but on time(12am) on that day!
She's coming back tomorrow from Malaysia. yey!
Dreaming on the plane now, I guess. Or shopping in Dubai.hee.

The Most Outstanding New Teacher of The Year (of UK) is from my school!

28th October 2008

Ms. Natalie Richards

Believe it or not? Believe it.

Congrats to Mrs. Richards for winning an amazing award. Who would guess it would be OURS (Bishop Gore Comprehensive School) - the only award won by Wales' school in The Teaching Awards of UK!

We had a special assembly last week which was on the last day before half term break started to celebrate her winning. After we gathered in the great hall, Mrs. Richard walked in from the main door as she were on red carpet - with a cheering and clapping people around. I sat with Carol & Emma at the back which unable me to see her clearly. I wish I wouldn't sit there.

The ceremony which was held in London has been broadcasted by BBC. Astro people (Malaysia) who have this channel may be able to watch this. Popular woo =D The video can be watched through this link.

im GLAD

12th October 2008

Catching a glimpse of the above picture, you might have an idea that I'm happy (unless you think that's a natural face of Chinese baby!). Yes, I am delighted, blissful and pleased so much! I was thinking why cant I write something about what I feel for my own satisfaction in my own blog? I've seen some bloggers who release their anger, annoy and dissatisfactions on their post. But I prefer to keep those rather than announce it. It might get far worse though - when it comes to a bad reputation except if its cheerful or cheery post released. Hey, you can even do press release for that! And here I am. (=

What I did? Hmm.. guess what. I did think this raya isnt as good as last year and i did think Raya in Malaysia is far awesome than here. I thought it was lyk that - first bcoz this is the first raya I celebrate without my late grandpa from my dad's side. Secondly, my grandpa from my mum's side had minor stroke in fourth raya, and thirdly, we cancelled a week Raya trip to Scotland for certain reasons et cetera. Its just get to my mind, this raya is so boring. I admit that it was not a good thought. But thats what I felt. Is it because there is gonna be less fun in raya when you're getting older or growing lyk some people said?

However, last weekend was making it much much much better. I made sushi - malay style, rendang ayam bla3. We had kinda lyk open house for Lampeter malays and also for A.Amir Syafiq who came from Bristol. The thing is my ibu went back to Malaysia last week for a month and yeah, we did cook! The menu was pretty good though - rendang ayam, rice cake, sushi, rojak+tauhu+cucur+salad, corn porridge, strawberry pie (tesco made :-p) and banana splits as desert. I supose those were okey-cooked otherwise people wont finish it! Thank you so much thank you to you people for the ziarah - they were 7 families from Lampeter and 1 family from Swansea. Sorry for any shortcomings. We are bringing our silaturrahim closer. You make me glad to be here.

At last, I started the six-day fast in Syawal today. Surely, Im so glad because I was planning to do it last weekend, but then I was ill. At the first, I had sore throat which I needed loads of water then fever then cold. This is a normal step I went through every single time when I had sore throat. That was caused by the heaters - all the heaters in schools are turning on now due to autumn/winter season. It absorbs your body water very well!

Alhamdulillah, I think my belly needs some rest after two weeks full of marvellous, sensational and superb foods! The 6-day fast has been done by our prophet Muhammad p.b.u.h and therefore as his 'ummah', why cant we? There is hadith which say, "He who fasts in the month of Ramadan followed by 6 days in Syawal, it is as if he has fasted for 1 year."

p/s: Beraya not to check out the food but for our silaturrahim. Remember that. You people who wish to come for raya to my house are warmly welcomed. :)

ehh raya ke-4!

3rd October 2008

Jangan kau lupa ketupat di dapur, rendang di kuali, jangan biar hangus - pesanan untuk anak dara khususnya yang rajen tulang-belulang untuk menolong masak sempena raya yang dah berabad hari yang lalu. (song BY kakak saya)

Raya Eid Fitri itu memberi makna kembali kepada fitrah. Jangan tak tahu. Raya jangan suka-suka je. Ziarah bukan sebab nak melantak atau perut lapar. Eratkan sillaturahim itu yang harus korang semat smart-smart dalam jiwa tu. (BY zf)

Orang tua bagi duet raya bukan nak suruh korang kaya-raya. Tapi itu cuma adat agar korang ziarah-menziarahi. Ada faham?

Meski ini raya ke-4 atau k-3 (di Malaysia), ingat pesanan dan ucapan saya. Saya tahu saya lambat cam penyu sebab saya ni dikategorikan budak malas nak update blog. Baru nak wish mintak duet raya kat korang. Bak sePOUND! Heheheh :D
.sekian.

*ceghite ghaye lepas raya eh*
saya malas lagi.
^-^

Maksud firman Allah: "Kamu semua wahai orang mu'min diminta menyempurnakan bilangan puasa sebulan dan kamu juga diminta bertakbir kepada Allah (berhari raya) kerana Allah beri kepada kamu hidayat." (al-Baqarah: 185)

12.08.2008

12th August 2008

12.9.2008. Genap sebulan arwah mbah lanang (atuk) meninggalkan kami. Terasa macam embah masih di alam dunia ini. Senyumanya, air matanya, ciumannya..Ahh! Rindu.

Ramai orang kata, kami beruntung. Sempat menatap wajahnya, menjaga makan minumnya dan ya, berada di sisinya membaca Yassin ketika nazaknya! Sebulan seminggu menghabiskan masa bersama, kalau diikutkan memang tidak cukup. sgt. Tapi, alhamdulillah. Cukuplah daripada tiada langsung. Dua minggu selepas itu, saya dan famili terbang ke Great Britain. Sepatutnya 12/8 itu, kami kembali ke negara musafir kami. Dan kerna takdir, embah pergi. Hati memang pilu tapi puas kerna semuanya settle. Daripada meninggalkan embah ketika embah menanggung kesakitan, memang tak sanggup. Biarlah embah pergi menemui penciptaNya. Itulah HIKMAH .


Benda yang paling saya ingat ialah saya orang yang pertama buat embah senyum selepas begitu lama tiada ukiran senyuman di mukanya! Waktu tu, baru sehari sampai Malaysia. Tak terniat pun nak buat lawak, tetiba terjadi plak lawaknya. Arwah embah senyum sampai tak boleh nak berhenti. Happy sangat! :) sampai menitis air mata embah kegembiraan. The days after that, kekadang kan, tak semene2 arwah embah gelak and senyum mendengar celotehku. Ntah ape, tak ingat. Main cerite jer ape2 sebab arwah ske sangat dengar. Setiap hari, pasti ada yang menziarahinya. Tak sah kalau tiada. Kadang-kadang ramai, kadang-kadang sikit. Tapi tetap ada.


Dua hari sebelum embah meninggal (Selasa), ekspo selama 4 hari di SMA Maahad Al-Islah baru sahaja selesai. SMA Maahad Al-Islah adalah sekolah agama swasta yang dibangunkan arwah ketika hidupnya. Impian arwah embah untuk mengumpulkan sanak-saudaranya di Hari Keluarga telah tercapai. Di mana ia diadakan pada hari Sabtu. Ramai dan meriah. Sayangnya, arwah di hospital ketika itu. Tapi, embah puas kerna dapat menemukan mereka semua. Petangnya pula, majlis Hi-Tea reunion Alumni Maahad Al-Islah. Manakala, pada hari Ahad adalah Hari Kecemerlangan Maahad Al-Islah, turut hadir MB Perak, Dato' Seri Ir. Hj. Nizar Jamaluddin. Arwah embah nak sangat hadir. Hadir seketika dan balik semula ke hospital. Berkali-kali embah beritahu pada doktor tentang itu. Dan berkali-kali juga dye menanya pada ayah tentang apa yang perlu embah ckp pada MB. Arwah embah excited sangat.


Diikutkan hati, banyak sangat nk dicelotehkan di ruangan ini. Cuma, kekangan masa membataskan. Dipendekkan la jadinye.


Hari Selasa pagi tuwh, ayah bgtau yang embah dah tenat. sangat2. Hilang terus ngantuk. Terus bersiap. Satu badan menggeletar. Critical time. It scared me out. Teratak embah mula dipenuhi orang ramai. Sekolah Maahad Al-Islah ditutup. Bacaan Yassin kedengaran. Syahadah diajarkan. Hati kepiluan. Arwah embah nazak sehingga lepas Zohor. Kira-kira pukul 2.45, embah kembali ke rahmatullah. Kerna Allah lebih sayangkan dirinyaa.. Sayang seribu kali sayang, saya tiada disisinya detik, saat itu. Ketika itu, saya sedang solat Zohor. Lemah sendi lututku. Tangisan kedengaran. Sedih. Hati pedih.


Malam itu, ramai yang hadir. Tak henti-henti. YB Salahuddin Ayub pun datang. Kebetulan ketika itu minggu Muktamar PAS. Di celah-celah kesibukan malam tuw, di bawah kain putih yang menyelimuti wajah arwah embah, jenazah embah tersenyum! Cucu mana yang tidak gembira melihatkan embahnya tersenyum. Hati rasa senang.

Arwah embah disolatkan pada pukul 11 pagi keesokan harinya, berimamkan anaknya, pak cikku. Ust. Ahmad Awang (Vice President of PAS) turut menjadi makmum. Masjid Jame' Al-Mansor yang dibangunkan arwah embah penuh sesak. Ramai yang tidak dapat solat. Masakan tidak. Air sembahyang habis. Habis digunakan.

Akhir tulisan, ribuan terima kasih saya ucapkan kepada semua yang mendoakan kesejahteraan embah dan yang tidak pernah putus memberi semangat kepada kami sekeluarga ketika kami mendambakannya. JazakallahKK. May Allah lets my grandpa stand there with those who stand for Allah!






'In every moment, I miss him.'

p/s: Ayah ada tulis di kolumnya tentang arwah embah di akhbar SIASAH keluaran kedua bulan Ogos. Tajuknya 'Pulanglah, wahai anakku!' Check it out!

-seeing people I love are happy is one of my happiness-

11th Jun 2008

Catatan ini adalah catatan yang agak ‘basi’ yang saya tak sempat catatkan disini. Walaubagaimanapun, tak salah kan kalau dicoretkan. :)

Merci Beaucoup MB Perak. (Thanks a lot MB Perak)

Alhamdulillah dalam sebulan yang lalu, embah lanang (mon grand-pere) saya telah menerima ziarah daripada PCik Nizar, MB Perak yang baru. Ketika itu, kalau tak silap, kami baru sahaja menerima berita bahawa embah lanang kami menghidap ‘Colon Cancer’ kira-kira seminggu. Terima Kasih banyak2 – itu sahaja yang saya bley katakan. Ziarah itu telah meniupkan semangat embah lanang untuk melawan penyakitnya dan memberi 1001 makna padanya.

Kami tahu, embah lanang (mon grand-pere) teringin sangat berjumpa dengan PCik Nizar. Hendak melihat sendiri bagaimana MB Perak kami yang baru. Embah lanang hanyalah menjadi salah satu daripada orang-orang yang mahu kepimpinan Pakatan Rakyat di Perak dan juga Malaysia berjaya. Orang yang tidak pernah jemu menyokong perjuangan Islam di Malaysia walaupun PAS pernah mengalami zaman jatuhnya. Dan kini, apabilah Perak diperintah oleh Pakatan Rakyat dibawah MB daripada PAS, pastinya hatinya berbunga2! Bunga-bunga kegembiraan dan kesyukuran.

Tahun lepas, PCik Nizar ada menziarahi embah lanang untuk hantar barang kiriman kepada keluarga di Malaysia sebab ketika itu PCik Nizar baru balik dari UK. Waktu itu, embah lanang jauh berbeza – sihat. Tapi kini, badannya jauh menyusut.

Ketika ziarah baru-baru ini, embah lanang (mon grand-pere) menangis terharu. Kebetulan ketika itu, ada program bersama MB Perak di Teluk Intan. Jadi, beliau singgah sebentar di teratak embah kami, kira-kira 45 minit. Tidaklah lama mana, tapi cukup. Di dalam ziarahnya, PCik Nizar call ayah untuk ayah memberi ucapan sepatah dua kata, menggunakan loudspeaker. Ayah memberi kata2 perangsang pada embah lanang dan selepas itu, PCik Nizar pun berucap sedikit. Turut bersama beliau adalah PCik Misbahul Munir (Set.Pol MB), pegawai khas beliau, dan beberapa orang yang lain.

Harapan kami agar embah lanang (mon grand-pere) sihat kembali dan kepada PCik Nizar, semoga Allah sentiasa menolong dan bersama PCik Nizar dalam segala urusan. And again, Merci Beucoup Monsieur Nizar!






































Joyeux anniversaire, ma soeur! (Happy Birthday, sis!)

Catatan yang kedua ini adalah agak baru. Jadi, tidaklah se'basi' yang pertama. hee :)) Dua minggu lepas, kami menyambut hari lahir kakak saya, Nur Najihah di mana sambutannya di buat bersama Johan, si cilik berambut perang. Seorang 17 tahun, seorang lagi 4 tahun - jauh beza woo. Bertempat di teratak Uncle Nor & Auntie Catherine dan alhamdulillah amat2 meriah. Cetait amusant!

Ia turut dimeriahkan dengan pasangan pengantin baru - Abg David dan Kak Nurul, Sahabat famili Uncle Nor - orang2 Muslim Tanzania yang sekaligus menjadi sahabat famili kami. Untuk kakak, saya telah membuat satu 'promise' untuk memberikan 10 hadiah. Dan untuk makluman, 7 sudah selesai, 3 lagi tinggal. Hurm..nak bagi ape lagi eh? Paling istimewa, pastinya Cheesey Bread Pizza by Chef Nur Nabilah. ^_^

Wish saya adalah - May all your wishes come true & may Allah blessing shower upon sis. Insyallah.























**This post has a bit of French as currently I am having a french-filled head due to couple of French exams I have got lately**
=D

Can I fly back without wings?

19th April 2008

Alas, a short reprieve after days of busy times - loads of things to be settled out make me delaying it, I swear! I managed to write, tell and ask something to each one of you in this little time. Here I am then. Here, in this chance, I would love to ask you dua' for my grandpa (embah lanang) as he currently in Teluk Intan Hospital for some reasons.

We phoned him last time. Hearing his voice, depressed me out. I am deeply saddened. I dunno how to describe it, but it’s just different - cold! Lemme tell you a bittersweet story. There was a nurse who advising him to be strong and patient in this difficult time. He was crying sadly tho and said he greatly misses us. That touched my heart entirely..

Then, me and my sis decided to ask people to sign the poster of our family - for my grandpa. We just want to show him, we always beside him. I asked my friends and teachers to sign it - so does my sis. Signatures that full with hopes. I want to deny about someone who said those signatures are nothing, neither prays nor hopes. The 'someone' also said my grandpa is not gonna understand it, something like meaningless. Excusez moi, Im so pretty sure, that would be so meaningful to him. That's what people called 'inner support'.

Rasulullah s.a.w has said "Dua’ is the very essence of worship" whereas in Al-Quran, Allah said "Call on Me; I will answer your (Prayer)!” To whom that pray for him, thanks a whole lot. May Allah give you rewards. And here, we devoted giving him support - dua', hajat prayers, hopes. Endless. InsyaAllah. Am just feeling..can I fly back without wings? Tell me.

"O' Allah, am here as your slave asking you. I beseech Thee for the speedy recovery or patience on the affliction and going out of my grandpa towards Thy mercy. Endow him with patience, courage and health, ya Allah. The Most Merciful, the Most Excellent Protector, the Most Excellent Lord and the Most Excellent Helper, please grant my dua'. Amin.."